TheDivaKnits

10 Things I am Great At!

“Disappearing” money. Give me $3k and see how long it takes me to make it vanish– it will astonish nearly all of you. No, I do not drink (on anything near a regular basis), smoke (at all), gamble, or do drugs (unless starbucks counts). And, in the last 2 years I have managed to curtail most of my wtf spending– you know, why did I need 3 different novelty sticky note pads, why do I need a pen with feathers on the end, etc etc. However, I have been working full time, going to school full time+ odd hours, and eating for 1/8 of a person is tiresome if you’re cooking. I eat out, alot. My eating out funds are comparable only to my bookfund.
Annoying Barry. Even his cousin Liam who ran around asking everyone for “the key” (what key, liam? ‘the key to wind barry up!’) can’t annoy him like I do. And I do so love a riled husband– they are ever so much fun to wrestle.
My job. I kick ass at my job.
explaining math to megan. Ok, I am not great but I am 100x better than Barry at it, so that makes me awesome in comparison.
Literary Analysis. Somewhere, I read that an english major should be able to take any text of literary anything and say something like “the novel X shares a remarkable likeness with the rap song ’six in da morning’ by iceT” and be able to back it up. I think up random stuff like this ALL the time. Today it was “the city novel” and its seemingly simultaneous disappearance due to the modernist movement along with its reappearance in graphic literature. IE something like A Tale of Two Cities vs… The Spirit. My professors usually stare at me in horror.
Knitting– if I ever finish anything, it looks awesome.
Sleeping, provided I actually get to sleep
Making people think. shhhh don’t tell anyone I said this. But really, this is just #s 5,3,2, and maybe 10 all added up.
Finding gifts for just about anybody. Most of the time.
Asking questions, permission, anything.

Things from Halloween on were nutball crazy. I have been on two separate sleeping medications (not at once) lived in 3 separate places (still keeping my house, consider the other two brief hiatuses of a sort. never call that crap a vacation.), taken the GRE (shudder), spent three-quarters of a week on the I-10, read too many “teacher” books, applied to grad school, been denied an exceptional admit to my local teaching credentialing program due to it being “too challenging” (BITCHES, PLEASE), gotten completely hammered and then some, taken test versions of the English CSET about 1.5 million times, spent a fortune, lost a fortune, and started school again. *gasp*

I am set to graduate in June. Word is still out on whether I will get into graduate school where I want to go or whether I will be spending a year in my current institution before next fall rolls around and I begin seriously applying myself.

In other news: Perhaps my husband will finally be a legal permanent resident come February 3rd, 2009. If so, it will have officially taken us 8 years to get him there. It will also spell the death notice for his current place of employment.

January 13th, 2009 by thediva | 2 Comments »

ahhhhhhsumness, i haz it

Yesterday I helped come up with this roleplaying prompt thing for a master’s class. “Pretend you are a criminal defense lawyer and you are defending the Joker, the Green Goblin, or some other really well known and definitly guilty villain. You have to wow the jury with your closing argument… what do you say?”

hehehe

October 31st, 2008 by thediva | 1 Comment »

Top Ten Horror Movies

Yay! I loves me some scary movies. (I actually had plans to go watch a bunch of these over the weekend with Barry, but guess what?! Immigration decided to deny his claim again and I had no reason to be in a hotel with him… grr that makes what? denial #6? I am sick and f–king tired of the USCIS and pretty soon I am just going to move back to England. F–k America, I am tired of living in limbo. You get spoon fed bullshit patriotism from the cradle and what happens? Your government sucks you dry just because you decided to get married at 19 to a BRITISH person {god forbid he turns out to be a terrorist} and had a child with him and have continued to be mostly faithful… grrrrrrrrrrr).

Anyhow, here’s my Ten on Tuesday:

Poltergeist. This movie freaked the hell out of me. It is the sole reason why I am afraid of EVPs and cannot stand to hear static or see snow on a tv. “They’re heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere…”
Cabin Fever. First it has the cute guy from “Boy Meets World” second, it is just one of the nastiest gore-fest movies ever and it has that wonderful tinge of verisimilitude… that leaves you thinking, Just how safe is that bottle of water you’re drinking?!?! Plus, Eli Roth. Babe, if you’re googling yourself and this blog post comes up, know that I would very happily leave the aforementioned husband to have your love child. Side benefit? you’re American so we won’t have to deal with USCIS.
The Entity. A woman gets raped, repeatedly by a poltergeist and everyone thinks she’s manifesting a guilt trip to cover up “masturbatorial fantasies” about her son. Any movie that adds to my vocabulary with a word like “masturbatorial” is up on my list. Plus, it just freaked me the hell out. *shudder*
Sleep Away Camp. Hehehe. This movie is so campy it’s bad. But still, the killer’s name is Angela, so what’s not to like?
The Shining. I’ve only watched it once. It scarred me and I probably won’t be able to ever watch it again. That said, it deserves to be on my list. Worst part? When Jack Nicholson is hitting on the sexy woman in the bathroom and all the sudden she’s looking like a quarter pounder a la Morgan Spurlock’s “SuperSize Me”. When he realizes that the woman is really a corpse… eeeew.
Halloween, Rob Zombie version. Oh my lord. Words cannot express how much I loved this movie. It’s only down so far on my list because of the other movies. I think that Rob Zombie did such an excellent job of semi-humanizing Michael Meyers and then completely removing humanity from his character, in such a way that totally made him fifty times more creepy. Because really, until Michael Meyers kills Danny Trejo you kind of feel sorry for him,
Thanksgiving. OK, it’s a trailer, not a real movie. But if ever there was a movie I could help bankroll (other than LGP movies, of course) it would be this one. Eli, if you’re still reading this, my phone number is ************. Call me.
Hostel 2. (I have no shame). This movie rocked so hard– I loved the ending. Hostel 1 was kind of a let down after Cabin Fever, but the sequel made up for everything and then some. And when the annoying chick from “the princess diaries” gets a scythe to the back… wow. Absolutely Amazing.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre (70s edition). Again, we go back to the reasoning “it freaked the hell out of me”. The house was an entire character in its own right, so dirty, grimy and spooky with the animal skeletons and everything. And the way the hitch hiker girl commits suicide in the beginning (”you’re going the wrong way”) totally gave me chills.
The Ring. So it was the beginning of the J-Horror flood. It still freaked me the hell out and when you think about it, we’ve now come full circle– from one movie about EVPs to another… only, different.

(I’d put Audrey Rose on the list, and Reincarnation by the guy who did The Ring, they were both pretty frightening.)

October 28th, 2008 by thediva | 5 Comments »

10 Great/Awful Things About TV Today

Please excuse the brief post. I am all conflicted about something in my personal life right now and therefore have no brains to think any otherwise profound thoughts. I am having a hormonal meltdown and somehow it’s like when your dog goes into heat and every male dog in the neighborhood is coming round. Only I am the bitch in question and the universe is dumping dogs–real ones not just work-related ones– into my lap in monumental numbers.

So. TV

GREAT: tivo. Ok, so technically this is a tv technology thing and not a programming thing. But still, I have been a thankful Tivo lover for 4 or more years now.
GREAT: Life. The guy is very zen but he’s also Sloane Forsyte underneath. (this is an unbelievably long story, but if you’ve ever read the Forsyte Saga, you probably hated Sloane. But I kind of liked him)
AWFUL: slowly dying franchises. You know what was great about say, Torchwood ending? It ended before it got to crap, like ER or CSI
GREAT: Neal Patrick Harris. He is in 2 words: legen dairy
GREAT: KITT! I really didn’t like the Knight Rider movie, but I do like the show. More importantly, I like Kitt. If there was anything that made me fall in love with Garmins and TomToms, it was that they reminded me of Kitt. Also, I love watching AIs become more human. It’s what made Data from TNG and Vicky from Small Wonder such interesting characters. It’s what makes me stay tuned in to the Sarah Connor Chronicles.
AWFUL: reality tv. Any kind. Up to and including dancing shows.
GREAT: there is a significant sci fi flavor to this season’s offerings
AWFUL: BBC– waiting for-freaking-ever to start filming the next Dr. Who. *sniffle*
AWFUL: Late starting seasons, like Medium.
AWFUL: this is more an issue with directv. For all of us DVR owners, pay per view has been fantastic. Buy it when you’re sleeping and take your time to watch it. Parents, buy Shrek3 on payperview and let your kidlet watch it 400x before removing it from your dvr. Now though, pay per view even on a dvr is time sensitive. So if you say, neglect to watch Run, Fat Boy, Run before 12:45(am) on Wednesday… you’re out $4 because it gets deleted and sent back into the ether of the universe.

That’s all. I am knitting intensely on the circular shrug. There was and still is much confusion with the Hat Attack 2 proceedings and I am kind of… not so bothered at this point. I made my weapon, I mailed it. I have been waiting for over 2 weeks now for my target to be declared a flake or for her assassin’s hat to show up in the mail. My own assasin has been labeled a flake and even now a mad hatter is probably out to get me. But I don’t care. I don’t even wear hats.

October 6th, 2008 by thediva | 1 Comment »

cough earning some street cred.

This actually is a knitting blog. So, here are some pics.

Hat Attack 2– my death hat (the one I made)

yorik, batman and connor macleod — they all agree:

As far as death hats go, “there can be only one!”

look at that lovely tasty sparkly alpaca silk yarn.

((if the pattern weren’t such a PITA I would knit it again for myself))

And my current actual, I mean I really am doing it, I promise wip: the circular shrug from Peony Knits. What a delightful pattern. I am knitting it while sitting in lecture (ignoring a certain teacher throwing me out for knitting– he was joking, I swear) and while cleaning up my tivo. It’s going fast!!

This is baby llama yarn on size 9 needles. The camera– sadly does not capture the true peacock goregousness (there I go making up words again) of this yarn.

And finally, a preview. I am making stitch markers for Melanie over at lotus knits to go with her yarn club. Yarn, captured in resin. This is a snapshot of the practice round (not her yarn– some truly gorgeous Socks That Rock, Jewel of the Nile.

don’t poke the resin too much while it is setting– it gets cloudy.

and: seal your yarn up in good old elmer’s glue. without it, the yarn melts or something. Swear to goodness.

*****

I forgot. I bought the pattern Giselle from Stitch Diva (by marnie maclean) but I haven’t cast on. I’ve been shopping around for yarn. well. I bought the new Mason Dixon book… sorry Giselle. I have a new MUST have sweater. I want this sweater on my body like yesterday:

drool. 1- I love the expanding ribs. Soo pretty, and feminine too. 2- the color is very pretty. 3- words. Yes. words and knitting. I don’t know why I like it, but I do. The hunt is on for an appropriately ‘me’ quote. I am taking suggestions.

Ok, that’s pretty much it for now. TTYL

October 3rd, 2008 by thediva | 2 Comments »

way late: 10 on Tuesday

10 things that scare me or freak me out (in no particular order)

white noise, more specifically “snow” on a television set. Thanks to the digital era it’s harder to actually receive snow with all sorts of peripherals plugged in and I generally get a nice blank #cccccc (med gray) screen with the words “no signal” instead of snow. The snow, it freaks me the hell out– so does static on the radio.
government buildings. I am not your typical “I see terrorists” American. But everything about government buildings is oppressive and scary, and given the way I feel about the government from time to time, I can rationalize why they would be a target. I am not afraid of post offices, however.
Big scary ants. The little sugar ants aren’t too bad. But the ones that are bigger than a centimeter freak me the hell out.
cars that drive by my house really, really slow.
People who have no business looking at me looking me straight in the eye. Like, if I am in a crowded restaurant and every time I look up it’s into someone’s eyes (the same someone).
beta fish. I once had a nightmare that involved a beta fish and a samurai sword… also, they are the most likely to just… disappear from their bowls.
having my husband be home when I don’t expect him. In the movies it is always cute when the hubby comes home and surprises the wife unexpectedly. In reality, there is something extremely creepy about coming home and feeling that there is someone in your house… when there shouldn’t be. He likes to hide, and lay in wait for me to find him. or just pop out from behind me and scare the crap out of me.
the thought that a teacher might call me at work and I will recognize their voice. big big big fear. ~~or maybe fantasy. not sure.~~
the blob. that movie freaked me the hell out.
waking up with unrecognizable bruises and cuts. I don’t know if it’s because of the vast number of alien abduction stories I consumed as a preteen, fear of leukemia, or barry’s brush with ITP but I absolutely freak whenever I find bruises or cuts on my person that I cannot explain. Like the horseshoe shaped one on my right knee that looks like a burn and just appeared the other day. It’s really freaky.

OK, that’s it for my check up. I did a bad bad thing and I will sleep poorly tonight. Note to self: when issuing a challenge to a friend, if it is of a personal *very* nature, make sure it’s actually a challenge. Also, stop fantasizing about your teachers. It’s rude and unprofessional. Regardless of how interesting you can imagine them to be.

In knitting news, the circular shrug is moving speedily. I should be done with the first 8 inches of ribbing relatively quickly. I was going to do it in this fabulous mostly angora yarn that I had named ‘dust bunny’ but the yarn was too thin and knit at the wrong gauge. So, last Friday I returned to Stitch Cafe and bought a bunch of baby llama yarn that is knitting up quickly and cuddly-ly on size 8s. It’s also not grey, which is a plus because last year’s #1 in class sweater (not knitted, just worn) was the same color of grey.

October 2nd, 2008 by thediva | 1 Comment »

“There are no cats in America”

Did you ever see that movie? The one about the Russian mice who immigrate to America and the baby mouse, Feival gets separated from his parents? There’s a scene in that film where the Russian mice and all the immigrants are singing and dancing and the song they are singing is about how the streets in America are paved with cheese and how there are “no cats in America” in other words, opportunities abound and restrictions or dangers are nonexistant.

For 8 long, tiring, stressful years Barry and I have been attempting to live the American dream. You know, the ‘pursuit of happiness’ and all that baloney. There have been many times where I have said, “screw it– let’s move back to England” or “I hate not being able to do ____________” you name it– because of the whole immigration bs. And when he got a letter in January or February of this year, charging him with 11 different crimes, including “entering the country at an unknown port” *cough– I had no idea that LAX and customs is an unknown port, but ok* I about flipped my lid.

Thursday we had yet another court date. I am getting tired of these court dates. I am getting tired of being fed a constant and steady stream of how great America is and how lucky I am when my husband can’t get a driver’s license, can’t get a bank account, etc because of fuck-ups and snafus ALL on the government’s side of things. However, I am pretty sure that the NEXT court date will be the last. As for how it will go– it’s any body’s guess.

Hopefully, this year we will have an extra something to be thankful for. I don’t want any of my whining about the USCIS (INS) to make it sound like I am ungrateful– after all I live in a country where I can speak my mind freely, my education is partially paid for by the government, my daughter is in a school which is teaching to be a greater thinker than she already is, I have a roof over my head, etc. But, when the USCIS stuff is over with, it will be nice to not live my life always saying “once this is done we can ____” because we will be able to.

September 28th, 2008 by thediva | 1 Comment »

10 Great Things That Happened This Summer

This is just a quick post– I should really be sleeping right now. Tuesdays are really LONG days for me and will continue to be until about Thanksgiving. Anyhow, back to Ten on Tuesday.

Barry was home so much or he was working within driving distance, so we saw oodles and oodles of each other. It was awesome.
Megan decided that not only was reading not as hard as she thought, but that it could be fun too!
Dark Knight. 3 times on a regular screen and once on IMAX. That pretty much rocked my summer.
We filmed Choose Your Own Death– and I didn’t kill Barry during the middle of it!
I bought a new(to me) car– a 2003 Kia Sorrento, fully loaded with an air conditioner that could be used to refrigerate foods on a cross-country haul.
I got 2 As and 1 B– It was my best quarter yet at CSUB.
ComicCon 2008– I went. I bought a Wonder Woman hoodie and lots of other stuff, including a weeping angel action figure from Doctor Who. (I also got felt up by a Dalek in front of a BBC merchandise booth.)
I photographed everything in my stash and am slowly adding info and pics to my ravelry stash.
Sherrilyn Kenyon signed my laptop @ comic con.
Barry and I went to Vegas and had an awesome time!

September 23rd, 2008 by thediva | No Comments »

Politics and Crap

I am so angry right now that my stomach hurts. Can you believe that?

How many people blindly vote with their party, never willing to listen to what the other party says? I’d like to know– honestly. Have YOU sat and listened to both sides give their speeches? (Probably the answer is yes because you are fabulous like me — otherwise why would you be reading this?)

There is a tone to the RNC that was missing from the DNC– one of condescension and outright disrespect. Sure, the Dems got in their jabs about McCain and the Republicans, but not in a way that was so… low. I had to turn off Huckabee’s speech and I only made it through 3/4 of Palin’s. I think it’s great that the Republicans nominated a female VP. But you know, 24 years ago another woman was a VP nominee for a major party. Geraldine Ferraro. It’s not that freaking big of a deal that Palin is a woman.

It really isn’t. Unless of course, you are so feminist (as to be anti-feminist) and will vote for a woman whose campaign has already released buttons like “Hoosiers for the HOT Chick” and “The HOT VP”. (barf) Or you are just going to vote for Palin because she is a female, regardless of the fact that she is 100% pro life and against anything other than advocating abstinence. ((which, I shall now stoop to republican levels of commentary for a moment– worked soo well for her underaged daughter))

About that–the whole “her daughter is pregnant” thing– is it really anyone’s business to know this? To discuss it? Family is kind of off limits and sacred. So my knee jerk reaction is, no way– discussing the daughter’s pregnancy is out of line. Unless of course, you are talking about how Ms. Palin is anti-sex education in any way shape or form except for abstinence, and could possibly make the matter a federal one.

I live in fear of a world where abortion is against the law. I saw that movie with Sissy Spacek and it scared the crap out of me. It kind of scares me that Palin and McCain are so obstinately pro-life. NOBODY should be able to and nobody can tell a woman what choice to make in that situation– not really. And I am pretty certain that at $500 a pop or more abortions aren’t exactly the world’s preferred method of birth control that the pro-lifer’s would have you believe. But I digress.

Let’s just talk about energy for a second.

Obama is against offshore drilling (um, even if we started drilling this very second it would not drop oil prices nor would it end America’s dependence on oil– eventually we will use all of the oil up and then what?) but he is for solar power, clean coal, wind power, biofuels, and limited nuclear power (at least that’s what I think he said.)

Palin says that her platform/party is for solar power, clean coal, windpower, nuclear power, and off shore drilling. And that even if off shore drilling doesn’t solve all our problems, it’s better than doing nothing.

Am I missing something?

The ONLY difference is that the dems support moving america away from oil dependence and the republicans just want to move america away from foreign oil dependence.

I’d also like to know how Obama’s statement of “I will lower taxes” means “I will raise all of your taxes and turn america into communist russia” comes from. But I am kind of politically stupid.

I am just really saddened by the sheer amount of low blows and outright blatantly screwy logic some people are employing in this race. I talk to everyone about this because I can be kind of screwy when it comes to reading people and maybe you see something differently and discussing it may bring me to a new realization.

But when I hear crap like 99% of all the black people will vote for Obama because he is black, or most of the disgruntled Hilary supporters will vote Palin because she is a female (despite the fact that she is like, the anti-Hilary) it kind of scares me. Are people really so rigid in their beliefs and so locked into stereotypes?? and don’t forget, I live in California.

September 4th, 2008 by thediva | 1 Comment »

Last of the Summer Sniffles

I have the unfortunate luck to be getting an attack of the summer sniffles. This is only mildly tolerable due to the fact that I am barely finished with two of the three courses I had for summer quarter, and therefore have a lighter workload. It isn’t really all that tolerable at all, as I hate being sick (really sick) with a passion. Especially colds because they start the same and then end up as pneumonia or bronchitis or laryngitis which all sound like pretty things to say, but their realities are not nearly as fun as saying them.

I just finished a book– a real one, not a non-fiction account of what it is like to teach, as a white person, in an all minority inner city school where you are not being lauded as the great white hope but instead laughed at for thinking you can be something as silly as the great white hope. Reading it was refreshing. Unfortunately, the writer had a style of writing that was extremely verbose and kind of crawled around in my brain and nestled there so I am going to stop writing now, less I start to make sure that everything is “exquisitely annotated, and, where possible, provide staggering visual aids” (Pessl 11). And in MLA format, no less.

The book, Special Topics in Calamity Physics, was a very entertaining read. However, to whoever claimed that it was part travelogue– have you ever read a travelogue? A casual mentioning of “Rhoda Harris, Galways, Indianna” followed by “Nondescript Redhead, Our Town, USA” is not, nor will it ever be a travelogue. Sadly, yes this was why I picked the book up– also because the amazon blurb said something about being packed to the gills with pop-culture and literary references. I give it a smile, nod, and my patented “I liked it, it was good” pin.

–all I am working on is the knitted converse shoes and trying to figure out which yarn I will use for Giselle.

August 1st, 2008 by thediva | No Comments »

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TheDivaKnits

10 Things I am Great At!

ahhhhhhsumness, i haz it

Top Ten Horror Movies

10 Great/Awful Things About TV Today

cough earning some street cred.

way late: 10 on Tuesday

“There are no cats in America”

10 Great Things That Happened This Summer

Politics and Crap

Last of the Summer Sniffles

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